Wednesday, May 30, 2007

A Typical Day in La-La Land

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

My Formal Nomination for Magic Head Coach


Why I think Larry Brown would be a great fit in Orlando:

* The Magic are a good team that has the potential to be great. They have the talent to make a serious push in the Eastern Conference next year. Okay, almost anyone can get to the Eastern Conference Finals nowadays. But how many teams have a nucleus of Dwight Howard, Darko Milicic, Jameer Nelson and Trevor Ariza? Exactly. The cupboard is far from bare in Orlando.
* With the aforementioned talent Brown can demonstrate how good a coach he is and erase some of the tarnish from the New York fiasco. Brown's too prideful to let that sour season be the final chapter in an amazing coaching career. Orlando's a great place for him to rebuild his legacy.
* Brown is primarily a defensive coach. The personnel (Howard, Ariza, Milicic, Dooling) has the potential to be terrorize teams with their length and quickness.
* Although Milicic rode the pine during his first stint with Brown in Detroit Larry is too savvy to let such promising players like Darko and J.J. Redick sit on the bench. Brian Hill was remarkably stubborn with his lineups. Larry won't be as ironclad with his rotations.
* His wife Shelly can hang out at Disney World. Seriously, we'll get her a season pass.
* Brown has a knack for developing guards (see Eric Snow, Allen Iverson and Chauncey Billups). Jameer Nelson got too obsessed with creating his own shot rather than involving his teammates last season. He has the potential to be a great point guard: he can shoot, post up and pass well. He just needs a coach that will push him. Larry's the guy.
* And finally, Brown is a coach with class. I'm not saying Hill wasn't a stand-up guy. In fact, from what I've read he's a pretty decent guy, just not a very good coach. But remember when Brown took a timeout during Reggie Miller's final game so everyone could bid farewell to a great player? That's the kind of man that'll win and win the right way.

Yes, Larry got a little stir crazy in Gotham but can you blame him? Anyone would get batty hanging around the Knicks. It was a full-blown franchise fiasco over there in 2006 due to:

* Steve Francis, the ultimate me-first player.
* Wacky Zeke, who would trade salsa, ketchup and a first-round pick for salt and then sign salt to a $30-million contract.
* Satan Dolan, mastermind of the dysfunctional Knickerbockers.

In addition to the Magic hiring Larry I'm assuming/hoping the organization will take care of some other matters:

* Resign Darko.
* Resign Jameer.
* Not waste spend a boatload of cash on Vince Carter.

Is it asking too much for one of the greatest coaches of all-time? Probably. Is it asking too much for Otis Smith not to make a ridiculous transaction this offseason? Probably.

Then again, the Trailblazers just won Greg Oden. Against the odds one can always hope.

Brian Hill Out as Magic Coach

Huzzah!

Elijah Dukes Needs Help, Common Sense or Both

According to reports:

The wife of Elijah Dukes filed for a restraining order against her husband and said the Tampa Bay rookie outfielder has made her fear for her life, The St. Petersburg Times reported Wednesday.

According to the report, NiShea Gilbert, 26, a teacher at Beth Shields Middle School in Ruskin, Fla, told the court that her husband threatened to killer and sent a photo of a gun to her cell phone.

Gilbert played a voice mail message for the Times that she said came from Dukes: "You dead, dawg. I ain't even bulls-------. Your kids, too."

Okay, that's horrible enough. You allegedly send a threatening picture and message. Your wife definitely requests a restraining order. Still, there's time to set the record straight, offer an apology or do something to move this incident toward a more positive direction.

Elijah's response:

"I'm just going to play ball, that's it," he said. "I've got to go. I've got a video game to finish."

I've got a video game to finish? Way to Elijah. Let's hope a chariot of fire picks you up and drops you off at a prison or mental health facility.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

So Theoretically Speaking...

If an NBA player leaves the bench during an altercation to perform CPR on a fallen teammate he would get suspended under the current rules.

Stu Jackson on the bogus penalties handed out from game 3 between the Suns and Spurs: "It's not a matter of fairness. It's a matter of correctness."

What kind of backward-ass thinking is that?

Monday, May 14, 2007

The Battle of the Bulge

Just a reminder that Shaq is scheduled to appear on tonight's edition of "Inside the NBA." The Big Aristotle and the Chuckster under one roof and on live television? The jokes will be flying tonight.

Monday, May 07, 2007

RIP Diego Corrales

Dan Rafael reports:

Former two-division world champion Diego "Chico" Corrales, who lived as hard as he fought, died in a motorcycle crash Monday night in Las Vegas.

If you don't know anything about Diego, remember him for one of the greatest rounds of boxing ever fought: