Monday, June 30, 2008

Roy Halladay Beat Up an Inferior Opponent


Very little shame in getting shutout by one of the best starters of this decade. Roy Halladay, with his obscenely high inning totals and equally obscenely low walk rates, feels like he belongs in a different era of baseball.

After sweeping an almost-as-awful-as-they-are Padres, perhaps Seattle was starting to feel good about itself. Let's see how it feels in the morning.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Three All-Star Relievers

Player A: 35.1 IP, 17 H, 3 BB, 40 K, 21 saves, .76 ERA
Player B: 22.1 IP, 12 H, 7 BB, 31 K 3 saves, .81 ERA
Player C: 35.0 IP, 21 H, 20 BB, 33 K, 31 saves, 2.06 ERA

These three pitchers have had outstanding seasons so far in 2008. Two are established names; the third not so much. Can you guess who they are?

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Ready for the answers?

A is the greatest reliever in history, Mariano Rivera. C is Francisco Rodriguez, one of the best closers in baseball. Combined they have 10 All-Star appearances. Last but certainly not least is B as in Brandon Morrow, the current closer for the Mariners. He's been nothing short of brilliant coming out for the seventh, eight and now ninth innings for last-place Seattle. In a year of profound futility for the M's Morrow stands out as a beacon of hope.

Brandon should be stretched out to eventually become a starter (much like Joba Chamberlain, but with more patience). In fact his dominance as a reliever is in a way bad for the Mariners because it takes time and effort away from properly developing as an inning eater. If he turns into an awesome closer that's great. But a good starter would be a better goal. Regardless, every M's fan should rejoice in watching Morrow mow down the opposition -- even if it is in short stints.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Still Not a Good Time to Root for a Certain Baseball Team Situated in the Northwest

Checking in one month later...

Your team still has the worst record in the AL Majors.
Your GM was fired.
Your manager was fired.
Your second-best prospect has been demoted to the minors.
Your best starter is injured.
Your second-best starter and most valuable pitcher is injured.

Seattle Mariners, this is your life!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

The Other Shoe Drops


John McLaren, the incompetent manager of the Mariners for about one season, has been fired. This is neither surprising nor scapegoating, as Seattle has been nothing short of stunningly awful when it was expected by many to be a high-priced contender.

Although this move won't salvage the season it is the correct decision. The M's will hopefully start reevaluating their situation with an eye toward the future.

Monday, June 16, 2008

One Down, One to Go


Bill Bavasi, architect of the worst team in baseball, has been fired. For the immediate future it offers little comfort to Mariners fans. This sad sack of a franchise is still going to struggle this season, possibly losing over a hundred games with a payroll excess of $110 million.

But there is light at the end of the tunnel. Perhaps, just maybe, ownership will wise up for once and a hire a strong baseball mind. The name most M's fans will clamor for is Chris Antonetti? Who is Chris Antonetti. He is Assistant GM of the Cleveland Indians as well as among the smarter and most coveted GM candidates in baseball. Over the last several years Boston, St. Louis and Pittsburgh have all seriously considered him to run their respective ballclubs.

Chris has learned from Mark Shapiro and baseball people rave about Antonetti's people skills and statistical savvy. He's the right guy for Seattle. U.S.S. Mariner says it best: Chris Antonetti for Mariners GM NOW


UPDATE: 6/17/08: A great read on who Chris is and what he represents.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Food for Thought

Since 1969 the NBA has given out a Finals MVP Award. There have been only eight players who have won the award more than once:

6-time winner
Michael Jordan

3-time winners
Tim Duncan
Shaquille O'Neal
Magic Johnson

2-time winners
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
Larry Bird
Hakeem Olajuwon
Willis Reed

Considering Kobe Bryant has about five years left in the prime of his career I'm guessing #24 won't win half a dozen Finals MVP awards. Right now he has one less than Cedric Maxwell and Chauncey Billups.

Monday, June 09, 2008

These Seattle Fucking Mariners Are a Bunch of Shitty Cocksucking Assholes

Several days ago in the midst of $117 million disaster of a season that finds the Seattle Mariners with the worst record in baseball Mount St. John McLaren exploded:




Just this morning the first real victim of this tragedy emerged as the M's fired hitting coach Jeff Pentland. His replacement? Lee Elia. Yes, that Elia.



If there aren't going to be any good times in Marinerville there might as well be fun times.

Sit tight this summer Seattle baseball fans! Tune in for a hundred losses and a thousand meltdowns!